Today's topic, what burden did you turn over to God? What cross did you shoulder that God relieved you of? As human beings we are wired to give in to temptations, that's why they're called temptations. Everyone has their guilty pleasure, their vice, and in some cases their full blown sin.
Love of money = Greed
Love of food = Gluttony
Love of the flesh = Lust
Now when I use the word "love" I mean to the level of an idol. Putting money, food, or flesh before God is a sin. I wrestle with all 3 of these in some capacity and pray over at least 2 of them nightly. I won't say that I put money before God, but it makes up the majority of my daily stress and worry. Where is it going? Do we have enough of it? Will we have enough next week? Are we spending wisely? Are we saving enough, or at all? At any random time of the day one of these questions is always on my mind. Why? On 3 separate occasions in the past month, I have been on the verge of panic over our finances and all 3 times we came out with exactly what we needed, no more and no less. Right on the money, if you'll pardon the pun. Now you might say I lucked out, and maybe I did, but luck and grace hang out real close to each other in my experience.
I love food, as anyone who knows me will attest. I revel in the challenge of cooking every single day. You don't tip the scales at 220 lbs by relying on peanut butter sandwiches and Jello, let me tell you. I wouldn't say that I regard food more than God, though I know I eat too much. I recognize that what I have, "my daily bread" even, is from Him who loves me. I also know my skill and passion for cooking is from Him as well. I am thankful for both of these things daily, and have never viewed food as an idol.
Now for that 3rd one, lust of the eyes, and lust of the flesh. I have tripped into this bear trap countless times. This October I will be married to my wife for 7 years. I love her and would do anything and everything to make her happy until my last sunset. Society and media on the other hand, use scantily clad women to try to sell me everything from cars to double bacon cheeseburgers. Since middle school I have been hooked on porn. It was free, easily accessible, and doesn't hurt anyone. How is this a bad thing? It skewed my impression of what a woman is supposed to be, that's how! Real world women and porn star women are two roads that will never cross. I allowed myself to be brainwashed into thinking real women are willing and able to reenact "Debbie Does Dallas: 500" at a moments notice. This is wrong.
The longer I was married, the more the truth of the matter became apparent. Page 218 of the Kamasutra (you know, the position that calls for a rope swing and peach preserves) was not in my future. But why not? I had a wife now, that's the best part of being married, isn't it? This confused my brainwashed self, and led me back to porn. I rationalized that if marriage didn't equal my getting what I had seen in pictures for the past 10 years, the pictures were still there, they were still free, and my imagination could fill in the blanks. At the end of the day, I didn't love my wife any less, and I would still do anything to make her happy. As far as I was concerned everybody came out on top.
Remember that selfless gift that lives in my dresser drawer? There are dozens of references to the "reward" awaiting those with any hint of sexual immorality in their lives. I seem to recall something about being grouped with the murders, rapist and liars for judgement, followed by a leisurely dip in a lake of fire and endless torment. GET ME OFF THAT LIST! I came before God in evening prayer, and admitted in a loud proud voice (inside my head at least) I love boobs! You made billions of them and they are great, but you only made 2 of them for me. They belong to my wife, and I love her the most. WHAM! My cross dropped. I owned up to the most powerful and controlling, burden of my life and turned it over to God. He loves me, I trust Him, and nothing can control me if He doesn't give it permission. I'll bet a whole pile of money that porn doesn't ask permission.
Since then it has been a conscious effort to not allow myself into situations where temptation will be found. That is to say I stopped looking for it, but it still looks for me. What is different now, you wonder? How do I avoid my former favorite bear trap? I wake up every morning with the same two thoughts: 1) I will be tempted today 2) My armor is shining and I will keep it that way.
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